April 8, 2011

9 May

This is the epic tale of how I met Tina Fey. The night before, I was perusing New York activities online when I came across a reading at the Union Square Barnes and Noble by the one and only Tina Fey. Apparently she had written her memoirs and dubbed them “Bossypants.” I immediately threw my coat on and headed to the Barnes and Noble close to my apartment. I bought the book and ran home with an excitement the likes I have not experienced since I bought the final Harry Potter book at the midnight release. NERD.

Anyways, I stayed up way past my bedtime, we’re talking 3 or 4 in the morning, reading the book and laughing hysterically. It was the exact book I needed to read just then. She is my hero and inspires me to keep working at what I love. The next day I headed down to the book release an hour early, figuring that would afford me plenty of time. As soon as I walk in the door, though, I am greeted by employees telling me that it is sold out, and there is no chance for me to get my book signed. I was meeting an old friend from Seattle in that neighborhood in a couple of hours, so I had nothing else to do, but just queue up behind many other hopefuls. I patiently stood in the line, reading the remainder of the book, enjoying myself to be honest. It felt like boot camp. The employees kept getting in everyone’s face saying that there was no way we were going to get our books signed, that we should give up. Many people in the line ahead of me did just that.

Not I.

Like I said, I was enjoying myself, and I felt like I deserved this. If Tina Fey knew what I’d been through, she would be more than happy to sign my book and probably even give me a hug. I am confident in this. Finally, they let some of us upstairs to the actual floor where Tina Fey was. I couldn’t see her, but I could see Grizz and Frank from “30 Rock.” I was so excited. It was going to happen after hours of waiting in line. My old friend, Eric, called me, and I told him my dilemma. He was supremely understanding and encouraging. He offered to come wait with me, but I told him that it was not easy to get as far as I had gotten. So he waited on a lower level of Barnes and Noble while I patiently waited to meet Tina. It wasn’t as glorious as I had imagined. I had hoped that I would be witty, and she would naturally fall in love with my charm, take me home, bake me a pie, hire me, and become my bestest friend EVER! Does that make me creepy, or does it just make me a really good fan?

As I got closer, I could hear other people trying to be witty and failing. I saw some give her gifts, which she accepted graciously, but with extreme hesitation. By the time I got my book signed, she looked exhausted. After all, she had agreed to sign an additional 100 or so books. I figured she’d heard it all before, so I just said, “Thank you so much.” She smiled at me, and I decided that it would be way cooler to sweep her off her feet with my charm when I run into her in the near future at a bakery or something. It’ll happen!

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